What Pets Actually Want & Need | Dr. Karolina Westlund

Westlund agrees with Huberman's summary of a study showing that dogs are averse to very rapid touch and that slow stroking causes their eyelids to hood and tension to dissipate. She connects this to the polyvagal theory, suggesting that when a human is calm and relaxed, they emit subtle cues that the animal reads, facilitating co-regulation. This is especially important because many people default to fast, excited patting when greeting a dog, which can inadvertently increase arousal. By consciously slowing down, owners can help their pets shift from high-arousal pleasant (quadrant 1) or unpleasant (quadrant 4) states into the calm, pleasant quadrant 2. She also notes that different individuals have different preferences, so the consent test should be used alongside slow petting.

Westlund cites a study showing a dose-response relationship: kittens handled for an hour or more daily become the classic 'lap cat' that seeks out human contact and purrs; those handled less than 15 minutes become friendly but independent, approaching briefly then walking away. This highlights the importance of early life experiences in shaping adult behavior. She connects this to the broader theme of early weaning and attachment, suggesting that both the quantity and quality of early interactions have lasting effects. For cat owners, this means that if you want a cuddly cat, you should either obtain a kitten from a breeder who does extensive handling or be prepared to invest that time yourself if you get a very young kitten.

Westlund mentions this as a common mistake, recalling her own first cat where the food was right next to the litter box. She explains that cats are solitary hunters and prefer to keep eating and elimination areas separate. In multi-cat homes, feeding cats in separate locations also reduces conflict, as they are not naturally inclined to eat together. This simple environmental adjustment can prevent litter box aversion and territorial marking.