We are raising life cripples. How do you destroy your own child with love? Prof. Mariusz Jędrzejko

The professor argues that the most critical period for brain development is the first three years. He and his wife decided that their son Krzysiu would not see a television or smartphone at all during this period. The TV is only allowed after the child goes to bed. He admits it is extremely hard because adults are addicted to their devices, but it is essential. He frames this as a necessary sacrifice to give the child a 'human' rather than 'digital' start. He connects it to the child's ability to eat meals with parents, observe the real world from the car (storks, tractors, forests), and not to have the constant dopamine hits from screens.

He emphasizes that giving a phone before 12 is 'crippling' the child. The schedule is not arbitrary but based on his team's research (he claims they are the best in Poland). He warns that parents who allow unlimited access are shortening their children's lives. The screen-free day is essential to teach the brain that pleasure comes from slower, real-world activities. He also insists that when children are at school, their phones must be in airplane mode and not used during lessons; the teacher is the 'master' in that room. He extends this to meals: no phones at the table, and nobody leaves until the mother agrees.

He rages against the 'liberal-left' concept that treats a 12-year-old as a full legal subject capable of managing unlimited rights. He argues that a child is a subject only as far as their psycho-emotional development allows. Therefore, parents must not give rights without duties. He gives examples: 'If my daughter wants internet, she gets it, but in return she cooks dinner once a week. If she wants a fancy smartphone, she cleans the toilet every Friday.' This system, he says, makes children understand that everything comes with responsibility. He contrasts it with modern families that give children only rights and remove all obligations, creating demanding, unhappy young people.

He uses this advice in marriage counseling. When a high-powered couple tells him they have everything but no time for a shared meal or walk, he prescribes leaving phones at home and walking together in the nearby forest (e.g., Las Kabacki). He compares this to the default consumerist behavior of going to a shopping mall to regulate tension, which does nothing to resolve the underlying emptiness. The forest is framed as a free, immediate antidote to the overstimulated urban life that destroys marriages.

He emphasizes the importance of the whole morning sequence: good sleep → wake up rested → cold shower → wash face → eat a proper breakfast without the screen → walk to school without a phone. This structure, he says, prevents the morning 'war' with getting up and ensures the child arrives at school physiologically ready to learn. It contrasts with the typical pattern of scrolling on Instagram while eating and then struggling to concentrate.

He explains that this rule, which he practices, makes children think 'Dad is under the thumb' but he would rather be under the thumb than visit their graves. It is not about authoritarian control but about creating a safe, predictable environment. The mother, having carried the child, is biologically and intuitively the primary guide. The father's role is to back her up, not to compete. This principle, he says, can be taught at his planned summer school.

He explains that the response showed him that his views represent the 'averaged views of a huge part of Poles' who crave progress but want culture to precede civilization. The overwhelming feedback (nearly 3000 comments, many personal messages) convinced him that people are hungry for truth and a return to fundamental values. This led him to conceive a real-life summer school where he and his wife will host parents, teaching them how to run a 'cool dad and cool mom' household through immersion in their home in Józefów. He also mentions planning many public talks because people tell him, 'We got a bit lost, but there is hope.'

He explains that having money was a problem because he would just spend it. His 'cure' was handing over complete financial control to his wife, who simply 'takes it all.' He feels no loss of security because he trusts her completely. Moreover, he donates roughly 10% of his yearly earnings to support students – paying for rooms, food, clothes, and textbooks. He states he does not feel any poorer and sees no reason why other wealthy Poles cannot do the same, arguing that one millionaire donating 5 million could create five potential Nobel laureates.

His central argument: a professional army will be destroyed within two months of conventional war. Poland's best defense, historically, has been irregular, partisan-style resistance – the Swedish Deluge was defeated by hit-and-run tactics, the Home Army tied down huge German forces with asymmetric actions, and Ukrainian troops on NATO exercises have proven that the conventional model is 'passionless.' He calculates that one tank's price can buy 100-120 anti-tank systems, making any armored column impossible. He claims the current defense minister is a doctor with no military background, and that only 5 ministers in the entire government are professionally prepared. Instead, every university graduate should undergo six months of military training, and citizens should be trained to defend their village, forest, and bridgeheads, so that any Russian soldier will know 'you will die on Polish soil.'

He provides multiple arguments: women outlive men by 9 years on average, they are biologically designed to bear children, and they are the ones who hold the family together under stress. He criticizes men for confusing their roles, saying they often act like 'roosters' but fail to see that the wife is the real manager. He shares that when he tells his wife he's leaving, she tells him to limit something – and he obeys because she is the wise leader. He wants to dismantle the narrative that women need to fight for position; instead, the state should pay them the national average salary for the first three years of motherhood so they can focus on child-rearing without career pressure. Then, men must understand their role is to support, not dominate.

He explains that children's brains have 86 billion neurons but mostly single or dual synapses – 'field paths, not highways'. Their neural networks cannot handle the flood of information and blue light from screens. He argues that parents who give phones to elementary schoolers are 'crippling' their children and shortening their lives. The protocol: no TV or smartphone for the first 3 years (their son Krzysiu gets zero screen time); from age 12, a child can have a smartphone but limited to 90 minutes on Mon, Wed, Fri, with Tuesday screen-free; ages13-17 get max3 hours daily but one full day a week without any screens. He emphasizes that the deep sleep needed to consolidate school learning only works if the child is 'cut off from this world' by11 PM, because brains wake around5 AM.